The shades of night were falling fast,
The rain was falling faster,
As through an alpine village passed
An alpine village pastor.
- A E Houseman.
As part of his pastoral duty,
The village priest, Father Venuti,
Would ride to the villa
Of lovely Ludmilla,
A widow, but young, full of beauty.
Her husband got killed by a freak
Wind gust as he stood on the peak.
It whipped round his ass,
Tipped him in a crevasse,
Just when he was taking a leak.
Well, that's what they claim, but you'll note,
That's just to explain why his choat
Was hanging exposed,
But some have supposed
That the pervert was fucking a goat...
Which not really wanting that dick
Inserted, replied with a kick,
Which lifted poor Fred,
Sent him arse over head,
To finish head first in the crick.
But back to our priest, who discharges
His duties and gently massages
Young Ludmilla's shoulders,
And his passion smoulders,
And the bulge 'neath his cassock enlarges.
Now Millie sure knows a few tricks,
And to his amazement his prick's
On show, in her hand,
A strongly veined gland:
"What's this, Joe Venuti's Blue Six?" *
She's begging him for a swiss roll,
Impalement upon the priest's pole.
How can he refuse?
He'll rapidly lose
Inhibition, his clothes and control.
His banner, that most strange device,
She bounced upon, found it so nice,
She'd not let him go
Till satisfied, so
The fellow came not twice but thrice.
All that was a long time ago,
And now, if you trudge through the snowAs shades of night fall,
You may hear the call:
"Excelsior!" then you will know...
You've got to the home of our Millie.
Who jumped on the reverend's dilly,
She lives with her lad,
(The father's his dad,)
Excelsior... ain't that name silly?
* * *
It may make a little sense if you know Longfellow's Excelsior.
*Obscure reference to long-forgotten jazz band.
Tuesday, April 06, 2004