Roll over Burl Ives, Ogg's coming through...



An old lady swallowed a fly.
Of course the old dear didn't die.
She relished the taste,
And caught more in haste,
And baked them all up in a pie.

An old lady swallowed a spider;
She felt the thing wriggle inside her;
She stopped the sensation
With intoxication,
And drowned the arachnid in cider.

An old lady swallowed a bird.
No, not all at once, that's absurd.
I don't wish to slander
That nice Colonel Sanders,
But she thinks 'twas not feathered but furred.

An old lady swallowed a cat;
In chow mein, from old Chinese Pat.
She needed a nurse,
But it could have been worse,
Quite often he fries up a rat.

An old lady swallowed a dog;
'Twas cooked by my cousin, Lee Og,
She claims 'twas delicious,
But I am suspicious,
I'm sure that her tubes it will clog.

An old lady swallowed a cow;
That's easy enough, this is how:
In burgers and pies,
With peas and french fries,
She's CJD variant now.

An old lady swallowed a horse,
That's CJD's symptoms, of course.
The horse wasn't pleased,
And lifted its knees,
And kicked with considerable force.

I'm told she was holding a spoon,
And gripping it tight she was soon,
High soaring, and now
You know how the cow,
And all else jumped over the moon.

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Last updated: Sun, 23 Sep 2001.