King Herod, at rest from his duty, Through the casement once spied him a beauty. "I'd pay any fee If she'd strip off for me. Go courtiers and fetch me that cutie."
So one, two, three courtiers went forth, Collected that gal from the north. Not Eskimo Nell, Whose tale you know well, Nor Lucy who sat on the wharf.
'Twas this young Salome they sought, And fetched her in to the court. There she took off veils, seven, And the king was in heaven, 'Cos her garment count then was just nought.
"Gee, honey,"he said, "That was nice." And then he jacked off in a trice. (Why the silly old fool Didn't use his stiff tool On the girl, I don't know.) "What's your price?"
Salome'd a baptising friend, Whose muff-diving pleased her no end, Without thinking she said: "I'd love John Baptist's head In my lap, then to heights I'd ascend."
Now the rest of the story's well known; How that dumb-ass that sat on the throne, Gave Salome her head, But the poor sap was dead, And never again was she blown.
Note: If the names in verse 2 are obscure, Then either your mind is too pure, Or you're new on this cruise, So go search Deja News, And there you will find them I'm sure.
Tiddy Ogg.
Last updated: Thu, 16 Sep 1999.