The Peasants' Revolt of 1381 is one of the most dramatic events of English history. What began as a local revolt in Essex quickly spread across much of the south east of England, The revolt began in Essex when locals in Brentwood reacted to an over-zealous poll-tax collector.

"I'm Davy,and with my friend Max, is
The gov'ment's collector of taxes.
Each adult must pay,
So we've come this way,
And trust that you serfs will grant access."

"Defining an adult, it's fair
To claim that it's them what has hair
Down there 'neath the navel,
And so me and Dave'll
Examine the youngsters down there."

"You must see it's right to inspect
These youngsters, so we can detect
If they are hirsutey;
It's plainly our duty,
To test and accept or reject."

"Now Max is the one who is gay, see,
So while I grope Sharon and Tracy,
He'll check if young Darren 
And Kevin are barren
Of fuzz..." But they thought it too racy...

... And drove our lascivious two
Away, swore they'd run the pair through,
for causing disquiet...
Thus started the riot,
And all of this stuff folks, is true!

I know it's now April the oneth,
The day when that deception is funth,
But this tale I heard,
Last week - twenty third
Or fourth, of the preceding month.

Thursday, April 03, 2003